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Friday, 17 April 2015

Appointments From Hell!

Well...today we had speech therapy! 

Going to appointments with Oliver is something I dread. It's one of them situations where you walk on egg shells throughout your entire journey to the appointment for fear of saying something...anything, that may transform your child from the happy, pleasant kid you see before you, in to a shrieking, irrational monster. This mood change can be provoked by the simplest thing, "oooh look at that tree Oliver, hasn't it got lovely green leaves?"

" I DONT LIKE LEAVES!!!"

It's at this point that you shrink back in to yourself and realise that your up and coming appointment is going to be a disaster and it's all your fault because you dared to mention a tree.

My most recent experience of this was at an audiology appointment. My crime this time being that there were too many toys in the waiting area and it was despicable for me to suggest that he should leave these in order to come in to another room and "speak with the nice lady". That appointment went something like this...

"Ok Oliver, I'm going make a noise and when you hear it.."

"I don't like noise"

"Well when you hear the noise, you put one of these little toy men on this bench"

"I don't like men"

"The noise comes from this bell.."

"I don't like bell"

At this point the audiologist is looking bewildered at me and clearly expecting me to intervene

"Don't look at me love, I get bollocked for pointing out a tree!"

Anyway, after persuasion tactics failing and with a screaming Oliver, at this point laid on the floor, the appointment was abruptly ended and 3 months later we're still waiting for another. So you can understand why the thought of attending an appointment has me sweating profusely.

Today I kept my mouth shut. I oohed and ahhhed in all the right places, allowed Oliver to lead conversation, pretty similar to if you were in a hostage situation I would imagine. With fists clenched and finger nails digging in to my palms we walked in to the clinic quite successfully. At one point the buzzer didn't work as we tried to enter the building, at which point I thought "oh shit..that's it, I'm done for!" But surprisingly he was fine...and when I say fine I mean he was chatty, polite and pleasant. For about 15 minutes. 

He then opened the door, midsession and said "come on Mummy, we're going now!"  *cringe*


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