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Sunday, 19 April 2015

Ways To Annoy Mummy Before 7am

1) At 6am decide that you would like to root through the kitchen cupboards and find something spectacular for breakfast. 
2) Proceed to prepare this exquisite breakfast completely independently, (this means totally refusing for mummy to help you in ANY way) until you end up with a giant mess.
3) Refuse to eat the breakfast you prepared and ask for a dry cracker
4) Request to watch a DVD - Ensure the DVD that you choose is one that you have previously removed from the case and hidden in a place that would be hard for even sniffer dogs to detect
5) Follow mummy around whilst she hunts high and low for the DVD, repeatedly asking her to find it and simultaneously pulling on her clothing
6) Tell mummy she's a good boy when she eventually finds it in daddy's shoe, underneath the bed.
7) Allow mummy to put the DVD on and before the film begins decide that actually this wasn't the DVD you wanted after all
8) Push your cup of milk all the way to the edge of the table to see how far it will balance until it falls off
9) As mummy goes to fetch the mop, decide to be helpful and use some of the clean laundry drying on the radiator to clean up some of the spilled milk
10) As mummy finally sits down to eat her own breakfast, plant yourself on her knee and decide that what she is eating is what you fancied for breakfast after all. 

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